Mar 05 2011

Shaka’s Funnies – Rate 1 to 10 …………………………. !?

Posted by As Seen On Tv in As-Seen-On-Tv

Question by Shaka: Shaka’s Funnies – Rate 1 to 10 …………………………. !?
Because I’m a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will continue to
fiddle with a coat hanger until long after hypothermia has set in.
Calling the RAC is not an option. I will win.
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries
at the supermarket, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find
exotic items like “cumin” or “tofu”. For all I know, these are the
same thing.
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, when the car isn’t running very well, I will open
the bonnet and stare at the engine as if I know exactly what I’m
looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will eventually say
to the other, “I used to be able to fix these things, but now with
all these computers and everything, I wouldn’t know where to start.”
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me
soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan.
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will
insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost
me twice as much once the repairman gets here and has to put it back
together.
___________________________________________________
Because I’m a man, I must hold the television remote control in my
hand while I watch TV.
If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole programme
looking for it.
____________________________________________________
Because I’m a man, there’s no need to ask me what I’m thinking
about. The honest answer is always either sex, cars, sex, sports or
sex. I have to make up something else when you ask, so don’t ask.
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, you don’t have to ask me if I liked the movie.
Chances are, if you’re crying at the end of it, I didn’t. And if
you’re feeling amorous afterwards….then I’ll certainly at least
remember the name and recommend it to others.
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, I think what you’re wearing is fine.
I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too.
Either pair of shoes is fine.
With the belt or without it, looks fine.
Your hair is fine.
You look fine.
Can we just go now?
_______________________________________________
Because I’m a man, and this is, after all, the year 2007, I will
share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking,
the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I’ll do the rest…
.like wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to
do.
______________________________________________
Because I am a man, I see flat-pack furniture as a challenge to have
the greatest possible number of left over and unused components at
the end. If the assembled furniture doesn’t collapse within the
hour, this is merely seen as a bonus.
______________________________________________
Because I am a man, I don’t have to ask for directions. Unknown
to women, the penis contains a magnetic homing device enabling men to
know exactly where they are on the Earth’s surface at all times. If
we do get lost, it’s because our wives have used too much girly
fabric conditioner on our underwear, thereby blocking out the
magnetic rays.

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Best answer:

Answer by cubbydwp
Lol. Funny stuff. I love the you look fine one. I always said that to this girl I use to date when she asked. I give this a 9.

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4 Responses to “Shaka’s Funnies – Rate 1 to 10 …………………………. !?”

  1. nat Says:

    this is excellent 10/10, have a star!!!

  2. squirtycream Says:

    Hits home it really does. 9/10 plus a star

  3. Kenneth L Says:

    this one’s real funny. i’ll give it a 10. and a star

  4. Nova Says:

    great…

    though according to this, my last bf wasn’t a real man ;-)

    8.5

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